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That other crack meme:

Write down the names of 12 characters. Then read and answer the questions.

You can't look at the questions (or click on the cut) until you write down the 12 characters you're going to use.



1. Vir Cotto
2. Stark
3. Vila Restal
4. Londo Mollari
5. G'Kar
6. River Tam
7. Simon Tam
8. Rupert Giles
9. Kira Nerys
10. Benjamin Sisko
11. Anya
12. Dawn Summers



Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?

(River/Anya)

I don't see this as a femme slash pairing. However, with some thought, this combination may make a very interesting gen story. Afterall, Anya has an attraction to female victims.

Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

(Londo)

ROTFL! No. A great character, but no.

What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?

(Dawn gets Giles pregnant.)

*hurts self laughing*

That's biologically impossible.

Can you rec any fic(s) about Nine?

(Kira Nerys)

Five Things Which Never Happened Between Kira and Dukat, by selenak

Would Two and Six make a good couple?

(Stark and River)

No, I don't think so. Both need stabilizing influences, not more crazy.

Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?

(G'Kar/Kira vs. G'Kar/Sisko)

Bring on the terrorist sex! Though I suppose we might have a problem getting past Kira's aversion to aliens. If this could not be surpassed, at least they could have a very interesting chat on politics and theology.

What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?

(Simon walks in on Stark and Dawn having sex.)

Ow! I don't see this happening.

Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.

(Vila/Sisko)

First of all, it would be gen. As for the plot itself: A space/time distortion and a case of mistaken identity leaves Benjamin Sisko a prisoner on the Liberator.

Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?

(Vir/Giles)

A lonely Jonathan casts a spell that brings television characters to life. As a result, Vir Cotto finds himself in Sunnydale. This would be gen and nothing but fluff. *g*

Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.

(Simon/Dawn)

"Waiting," a season five hospital fic. Gen.

What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?

(Londo deflowers Vir.)

Okay, Londo wouldn't do it personally, number one, because that way lies horror and brain bleach. Instead, after deciding that Vir really does need to get out more, Londo would hire a lovely, charming lady of the evening skilled in dance, music and conversation. He would then force Vir to accept this gift or risk dishonor.

Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?

(Simon)

Yes, I believe so. I don't blame them, either, since Simon is gay and all.

Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?

(Vila Restal)

Yes. They write it, too.

Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?

(Anya)

I'm not sure. I might, however.

Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?

(Stark/Londo/G'Kar)

ROTFL! Perhaps someone drunk or crazy enough might write Londo/G'Kar with Stark as an accidental voyeur.

What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?

(Sisko)

Sexual passion? Likely something unintelligible. Or, if he should accidentally tap into the Prophets' mojo, he might scream some strange revelation about future events that no one but he understands.

If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?

(Giles)

Great Maker, I haven't even begun to put Buffy to music.

If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?

(Vir/River/Dawn)

None. Because it would be gen. Though perhaps with River involved, there might be a disturbing moment or two.

What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?

(Stark picks up Sisko)

The concept breaks my brain quite a lot.

When was the last time you read a fic about Five?

(G'Kar)

I've read fic about G'Kar quite recently, either from andrastewhite or selenak.

What is Six's super-sekrit kink?

(River)

Partners who can calculate pi to at least one hundred decimal places, or carry on a bracing conversation regarding current controversies in astrophysics.

Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?

(Anya/Kira)

No, I'm not really seeing it.

If Three and Seven get together, who tops?

(Vila/Simon)

I don't see this pairing, as my Vila is straight.

"One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.

Vir and Kira are in a happy relationship until Kira suddenly runs off with Londo. Vir, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Anya and a brief unhappy affair with Dawn, then follows the wise advice of G'Kar and finds true love with Vila.

*dies and is dead from the hilarity*

Ow. Ow. Ow. I wouldn't give this assignment to anybody.

How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?

(Simon/Giles)

Giles is certainly more deserving than Jayne. *g*

Comments

I wrote an Anya flclet.

These memes crack me up. I just tried to do one myself but I think I broke something from all the convulsing. My multi-fandom crossovers were extra weird because the actors had been on each other shows playing different characters. Oh, there was incest and other badness. I think I'll leave memes like these to the experts. :)
I wrote an Anya flclet.

Really? Where?
Oh, god. It was one of the first fics I wrote. It probably sucks. You can find all my fics on my journal in the side column. Just go to my journal and scroll down a little and you'll see it. Some of them, like Buffy's Diary, I want to rewrite.

Here's my Anya ficlet: Thornton's Hope. If you read it, tell me what you think, good or bad. :)
Awww. I really liked that.
Thanks. Yeah, I read it again. It's not too bad. I wrote that in response to a fake Chosen script going around during the end of season 7, where Andrew told Anya that Xander died saving his life.
Perhaps someone drunk or crazy enough might write Londo/G'Kar with Stark as an accidental voyeur.

Knowing Stark, I wouldn't be so sure it was accidental. :)
Knowing Stark, I wouldn't be so sure it was accidental. :)

Ah, but would he even find that pairing remotely attractive?
He might find it interesting. :)
In a "By the Goddess, how do they do that?" kind of way? *g*
What is Six's super-sekrit kink?

(River)

Partners who can calculate pi to at least one hundred decimal places, or carry on a bracing conversation regarding current controversies in astrophysics.


My God, River's in love with Fred!
*g*

Haven't met Fred yet, so I can't comment yea or nay.
Would Stark and River make a good couple?

Sometimes he woke up to the sound of screaming, the screams of a caged animal being drugged and cut, and he cringed in fear, got all turned around. Then he heard whose screams they were, and shot back to the present. She was throwing things; the tiny retrofit sensor array circuitboards he sold at the spaceport were hitting the wall and flying apart with a sharp plastic snap. "Shhhh!" he said, as if somehow he expected her to pay attention, "Shhh! River, come back to..." He staggered backwards as she screamed at him, thrusting her hand (and the soldering torch in it) towards his face. He began to chant under his breath; not some traditional Banik mysticism, or even Delvian, but just the words "Must stay calm, must be whole," over and over again. River climbed onto the work table, crouching in the corner, and Stark saw himself there in her place, crouching, cowering, and winced. He dipped his head and reached to remove his mask, looking back up at her slowly as a soft golden glow fell across her face and the fear fell out of her eyes. She stared back at him.

He climbed up onto the table with her and tried to put his arms around her, rather clumsily as he tried to get his mask to fall into the right spot. "No Chair, no Academy, no Chair, no Academy."

"Voices," she said, "they chase and they chase, and... poke needles, and..." She clutched at her clothing and started to tear at it.

"Shhh... voices, voices, they stay on their side, you stay on your side. Just voices. Everyone hears those." They sat quietly together on the table, catching their breath.

"I'll get better," said River quietly, "I promise, I will."

"You will," said Stark. "I got better for a while, when Zhaan loved me. You'll get better, too. We both will."

Her head fell against his chest. "They think I can't tell, but I can. And it doesn't stop, it doesn't ever stop."

"No," he said, stroking her hair, "it doesn't." He looked out the window as the moonlight fell across the dry, dusty earth, casting shadows from the fenceposts. "It doesn't."
Well. I stand corrected. *g*
Wow. That... works. Really well. And is quite lovely.

I am... startled. But pleased. Hey, you know, this was one of my Multiverse requests! (Well, except, OK, I asked for gen. Which I'm starting to think I shouldn't have. :))
You shouldn't have. :)
Damn. Damn.

This is so... beautiful. In a creepy RSR fic kind of way. XD